It has come and gone

Time flies when you're having fun.

Yesterday was the academic job interview, and I didn't interview like crap like I usually do, I actually did okay for most of the day. Could be the cold drugs, that kept me happy and energized and ready to answer any and all questions....could be that I just loved the department and all the people in it that I'd do almost anything to work there. No, I wouldn't slide naked through the ice outside yelling "yeehaw!" but, well, almost anything. It's an excellent place, I'd love it.

I did do a few things that kept me awake all night thinking, "Why the hell did I say that?"....or maybe I was awake all night because my cold immediately tripled in intensity when I got home last night, so I nearly fell in the door in the evening.

Things started like this: I got up, and felt the full intensity of a headcold gone mad. Eyes gushing tears, head clogged up, disorientation. I don't do over the counter medication very well, but I gobbled down two Advil Cold & Sinus (lets you function without making you feel like you're wallowing in a drug-induced cloud) and hoped for the best. Tried vainly to apply makeup, gave that up completely and figured well, fuck it if they need me with makeup on, it's not happening today. Wore the prescribed black pants and turtleneck, and ended up with LaCanadienne ankle boots, because the weather forecast for yesterday said heavy snow, ice pellets, turning to freezing rain. Fantastic. Dropped off Big One at her friend's house so they could walk to school together, and indicating to the mum that if Hub couldn't get back in time, that she should bring Big One home with her. No problemo.

I made it to the U on time, and in fact got to to the Chair's Office with eight minutes to spare, which meant not going in of course, but going to find a washroom to hang around for five minutes (apply mascara? nah. by this point, I'd given up on that part of the day.) and then went back to the office. Quick chat with him, then with another faculty member who was so nice I just wanted to give him a warm hug (I didn't, come on now). Then gave my seminar, which went fine...I'm so used to talking in front of groups I don't get nervous about these things at all. Then a tour of the X-ray facilities in Physics, then lunch at the Faculty Club (not a pretentious place) then more visits, then the university closed for inclement weather.

Yeesh. We think. What the hell do we do now? So while they didn't have to, everyone on the selection committee stayed for the round-table discussion/grilling session.

I'd popped more advil after lunch, but was starting to show a little wear and tear around the edges by this point. My day was totally packed with visiting people, there was no break at all for me, and I'd been talking a lot all day. We started this round table thing at about 3:00, and by 3:30 my voice started to cut out. Not completely, I held on to the squeak until the end of that part, then went to talk to the grad studies advisor in the dept while they talked about me. Back for a last debriefing with the chair 30 minutes later, and after another 45 minutes with him, I was baked. It was 6:00p.m. and we weren't quite the only people on campus, but almost. He had cancelled dinner because I wasn't doing that well and because of the weather, so we walked out to the parking lot through the snow, both on the ground and the blowing icy/snow/crap that was blowing horizontally into our eyes. Luckily, I didn't quite have to dig out my car, just brush off a lot of the same crap (I told him as we were parting ways that this is east coast weather) then drive home through more of it, because the streets weren't plowed yet.

Got home, Hub took my coat, I tried to say hi to the darlings but all that came out was a squeak. Big One said, "Oh Mumma, you don't sound very good at all. You're very sick, you should go to bed." Which was true, but instead I put on my pajamas, tried to eat something and drank a nice big martini. At this point Hub told me that Big One got left at school until 3:45, and that the school had closed early. Turns out that they had tried to call me during the day but I didn't have my phone on during the interview so didn't know about that. Hub had called the mum (mentioned above) but she hadn't picked up her daughter, someone else had, and they didn't bring Big One. So the darling was left at the school with the principal until Hub got there, and he was late because it took two hours to drive the normal 45 minute route from work. I listened to this very carefully, and then I passed out on the couch.

I woke up at about 10:00 or so, emailed the chair to thank him for the interview and for the fact that the faculty stayed on to finish the interview even in the face of the university closure. I emailed another faculty member that I had called a pain in the ass during the round table (I do know him and he was being a pain, but generally, when trying to impress a group of people? you don't revert to swearing. In fact I'm pretty sure I swore four or five times during the course of the day, and let's blame it on the cold drugs, shall we? sure.) to apologize for my lack of grace under fire. He replied this morning with a don't worry about it, I figured you were just comfortable enough to say whatever you wanted. Whew. Did I mention loving this department?

Conversely, there is one guy who is a patented asshole, and while I'm pretty sure that I let on that he was putting me on edge (I don't cover up those feelings. I figure that people should get a good bead on the fact that they're dipshits, which he was. I don't think that he cared much though, he seemed pretty self-concerned.) I didn't call him anything other than his name. I did get to tell him that he couldn't mumble and that he had to speak directly to me to ask a question, however, and then I stopped him because while he was speaking more loudly, he put his hand in front of his mouth. You can't do that to a deaf person who relies heavily on lip-reading, and so I shook him up being very pointed in my directions. He needed the shaking. And his questions were bogus anyway.

Every single person that I met with separately said that they loved being in the department because everyone, without exception, is supportive of everyone else. It's like one big fuzzy group hug all the time. Quelle difference from my previous department, where all those big fish in small seas spent so much time trying to show up everyone else. This place has 19 (I'd be #20) independent faculty members, all of whom work on different areas of chemistry research, but all of whom rely on each other. They seem to get along remarkably well, better than any group I've seen.

I won't know anything until the beginning of April. I don't know what will happen with my NSERC grant in the meantime, because those results come out near the end of March. I'll hold tight, not worry about it because there's nothing I can do. I only fret about things that I could have done better, or about things I will do, but not about things where I have no control. They will interview three more people, and with any luck, the chair will reschedule dinner for us so I'll have another sort of "kick at the can" before the final decision is made.

And that's about it. I'm not teaching today because I can't talk. The kids did go to school, and Hub did drive down the road to work. Haven't heard from anyone so I assume all is well. It's 9:48 a.m. and I could go and lounge on the couch and watch tv, wait for the cold medication to start working, maybe clean myself up a bit. The other guys have to teach for me today because I'm sick......and at least I lasted the whole day yesterday. I couldn't have gone for dinner even if the weather had been good, but at least there was that excuse to cancel it. So now we wait.